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Ten years ago I made one of the most remarkable decisions in my lifetime. Shortly after the Y2K calm-down, I stood in the deluxe windowed office of my sourcing group's manager for a brief conference. It was a frigid wintry day, much like today in Chicago, with the sun shining over the car-populated, snow-plowed parking lot below.
As I spoke with Elaine, a high-ranking manager of capable proportions (and 30 years my senior) about department business, the sunshine glistened off the window and into my eyes. I suddenly experienced an epiphany: There was another world outside of my cubical walls, "out there" beyond this windowed office and parking lot of the 9 to 5 workday, beyond monthly reports, vendor relationships, and the comfortable benefits that came with the bi-weekly paycheck, vacation time, and accumulating sick days I had grown accustomed to in the last seven years. There was a nourishing, fulfilling, creative place for me in the world that I longed for. Creative bliss awaited, and I had to go find it. Yes, I knew in that moment that only I could set myself free from the fantasy that I'd be happy retiring from this corporation in 30 more years.
I still remember the cold, gray, sunless day in March 2000 — my last day at the electronics giant that had played an integral role in awakening the creative passions in my life. After saying good-byes to co-workers and packing up my desk, my immediate supervisor, Ed, accompanied me to my exit-interview and then escorted me past security and out the front door for the last time. I puzzled many people, including him, over my decision to leave the company. As we parted, Ed held out his hand for my ID badge and said, "Well, good luck." I shook his hand and thanked him for being an exceptional boss. The butterflies in my stomach fluttered as I turned away and walked towards the parking lot to my car, wondering what I just did. And, what was I going to do now?
Three months later, I found myself excited to be back in college studying graphic art and design, and out of pure passion, planting the very first seeds of the Creativity Portal Web site.
When people say, "I have no idea what I want to do," I smile and think, yes you do. Just sit quietly with yourself and listen. You'll feel it. Whatever it is that excites you when you think about it, that thing that brings you joy and creative fulfillment when you act on it, that's what you want to do. And sometimes, you'll make remarkable, puzzling decisions in order to do it.
Ten years would have passed either way for me — whether I stayed at the company or left it to experience creative passion. If I stayed, maybe I would have climbed a few more rungs on the corporate ladder...or have been downsized out in a merge. Speculating doesn't matter because here's the reality: Today I'm more aligned with my inner compass than ever, living out my creative passions and looking out my home office window at the snow-covered grass on my lawn. Canadian geese are flying above in a stretch of sky heading where their instincts tell them to go. Instinct, intuition, inner-knowing — we do have an inner mechanism that helps us know where we belong.
The sun is glistening through the window pane as I sip hot morning coffee and manage my business affairs for the day. I smile, eternally grateful for the nudging's of my soul. Today I'm more certain than ever that the creative longing within will find a way to express itself when given an opening. What will yours say? •
© 2010 Chris Dunmire, CoachingYourCreativity.com. All rights reserved. (1/4/10). Please do not duplicate this article elsewhere without my permission.
About the Author
Chris Dunmire finds meaning in life as an artist, writer, humorist, and Certified Kaizen-Muse Creativity Coach®, and is the driving force behind the popular Creativity-Portal.com Web site. Chris inspires people of all ages to be more creative through her articles, writing prompts, and project e-playbooks like her popular Dollar Bill Origami Money Plant, a "fun to make and gift away" craft project available for instant download at CreativeSlush.com.
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